alessandra (blue_phoria) wrote,

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I remember, when I was younger, I used to stare at digital clocks, all the time. You know, the rectangle kind, just the numbers? Yeah. Like the one on the microwave, the one on the computer, my alarm clock. That sort of thing. I'd stare, and stare, and stare, and wait for the minute to change. It never did, when I was staring. I swore time was against me because it'd never let me see it change. It seemed like the only time the minute would change was when I was blinking, or yawning, or distracted by a sibling, etc., etc. That made me mad. I'd wake up in the middle of the night and stare at my alarm clock, so there'd be no siblings to distract me, no sounds to find the source of. Time wouldn't change for me, then, either. I'd fall asleep, before I even knew it.

Eventually, I gave up. Time didn't want to change for me. It was painfully obvious.

Last night, I realized, recently, I watch time change quite a lot, these days. It's odd. Then, I wanted it to change so badly, I'd lose sleep over it. Now, I feel like it's changing too fast, and, for some reason, I can't keep track of it. Like even though I watch it change so easily, it's changing faster than it says it is.

Geh. That makes no sense.

I guess, when I was younger, I was worried that if I took my eyes off time for a second, I'd lose sight of it and it'd just go away. I don't know why I thought that way.

I guess I think that way about a lot of things.
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